Feeling Overwhelmed by Homemaking? You’re Not Alone
This post covers homemaking habits to start (and things to stop doing!), budgeting tips, homemaking systems to put in place, and more.
Homemaking can feel vague, intimidating, or unrealistic when you’re starting out. After years of working in the corporate and professional world, I felt a bit lost becoming a stay-at-home mom. I hadn’t had much experience cooking from scratch, and I wasn’t sure what the structure of my days were going to look like. Now that I’m a mom of 2, I feel like I have a bit more perspective.
One of the beautiful parts of homemaking is that there’s no perfect standard. As long as you’re committed to learning and getting better everyday, you will thrive. And so will your children and husband. Happy wife = happy life.
What Homemaking Really Means (And What It Doesn’t)
Homemaking Isn’t About Perfection
I certainly went through a period of time when I became a homemaker where I felt like I needed to apologize after every meal: “sorry, is the meat dry?? I really tried to cook it properly” or “sorry, I think I added too much pepper”, and so on. Let me be clear, my husband is so supportive & awesome, and has never once made me feel like I needed to apologize, but I had really high expectations of myself. I wanted to skip the learning phase and just automatically be good at things. Since then, I’ve begun to enjoy the learning phase; experimenting with recipes and trying new things. There is no perfect way to be a homemaker!
Homemaking Looks Different in Every Season of Life
If you have children, then you understand this couldn’t be more true. I have a toddler and a newborn, and with each child there has already been numerous transition periods of trying to figure out how to do things. But seasons of homemaking aren’t just limited to children – perhaps there is a family member with health issues, your spouse is changing their job, or you’re moving to a new location. These could all be barriers for easy homemaking. It’s important to remember that each phase of life is a season; the good phases and the bad.
You Don’t Need Fancy Systems to Be a Homemaker
Imagine what your great grandmother was working with when she was a homemaker back in the day. A wonderful part of homemaking is that you don’t need fancy tech or gadgets, and you don’t need a huge income to make your life feel fulfilling in this role. You also don’t need to follow specific systems that feel unrealistic for your family. Homemaking is what you make it.
Start With Your Why: What Kind of Home Do You Want?
Defining Your Priorities at Home
Your priorities at home are going to be different than mine, and different from your neighbors’. We all have specific things that are important to us in our homes and it’s important you figure out what that is for you and your family. Is it dinner on the table by 5:00 pm? Is it having a clean house every night before bed? Is it cooking every meal from scratch?
For my family, striving for a clean kitchen each night is important. We don’t always reach this goal because life is busy, but it’s something we strive for daily. As a homemaker I also try to have dinner ready by 5:30 or 6:00.
Priorities you could focus on are:
- Maintaining general cleanliness
- Cooking food from scratch
- Setting aside daily time for yourself to relax
Choosing Function Over Aesthetics
In a world where Pinterest and Instagram set the standard for appearances, it’s important to remember that not everything in your home needs to be social media ready. As a mom of a toddler, let’s just say things can get a little messy fairly quickly. I’ve had to retrain my brain to be okay with a bit of clutter while my son is playing instead of always feeling like I needed to immediately clean up. Instead of always trying to keep it looking untouched in my home, I allow it to be lived in. During nap times or at the end of the day is when I focus on tidying up toys, books, or items that are out of place.
Letting Go of Comparison
Sometimes it feels impossible not to compare yourself to other wives and moms out there; especially with social media. Remembering that no one’s life is perfect and that social media truly is a highlight reel will save your sanity. As a mother and homemaker, I try to embody the mindset of what I imagine a mom in the 90’s would have: compiling advice from trusted moms, wives, and mentors in my personal life, and not worrying what strangers are up to. This also allows be to tap into my own creativity and let my intuition lead the way.
The First 5 Homemaking Habits to Focus On
- Keep Dinner Simple and Repeatable
Choose a handful of easy meals you can make on repeat without thinking. Simple, familiar dinners reduce decision fatigue and make daily life feel more manageable. - Do a Small Daily Reset
Spend 10–15 minutes each day resetting the main living areas of your home. This small habit prevents mess from piling up and helps your home feel calmer overnight. - Create One Basic Cleaning Routine
Start with one simple routine you can stick to, even on busy days. Consistency matters far more than having a perfect or detailed cleaning schedule. - Declutter One Area at a Time
Focus on one drawer, shelf, or small space instead of the entire house. Small wins build momentum and make decluttering feel doable. - Build Habits That Support Your Energy, Not Drain It
Homemaking should fit your life, not exhaust you. Choose habits that feel sustainable and adjust them as your energy and season of life change.
Homemaking for Beginners: What to Stop Doing
Stop Trying to Do Everything at Once
If I’ve learned anything about homemaking and motherhood, it’s that it is a learning process. And a journey. You don’t need to do “all of the things” – you just need to be willing to try! As you continue to gain confidence in different areas of homemaking, you’ll find it easier to add more tasks to your routine. Be patient with yourself.
Stop Copying Other People’s Routines
What works for some families may not work for yours. Be willing to try different routines to see what sticks and which routines feel right. Remember that there is no right way to be a homemaker.
Stop Waiting for the “Right Time”
You don’t need to have all areas of your life perfect before you start cooking from scratch or decluttering your home. Just start doing it. The rest will fall into place.
Basic Homemaking Systems Every Beginner Need
A Simple Meal Plan
Try checking out these Budget-Friendly Healthy Meals for Families, or if you want something less structured, The No Meal Plan Way to Feed Your Family.
A Realistic Cleaning Schedule
A cleaning schedule is something I’ve personally always wanted to have but struggle to implement in my own life & routine. However this Weekly Cleaning Schedule seems pretty doable?
A Basic Grocery System
My husband and I shop for groceries once per week and aim to get deals on expensive items as much as possible. We go for on-sale meat at our local Walmart which saves us lots of money. Recently, bacon was 50% off so we bought 10 packs and put them all in the deep freezer. The Tex-Mex Mom has a great article about a $135 Two Week Grocery Budget and Meal Plan.
Tools You Actually Need as a Homemaker
Cleaning Tools You’ll Use Regularly
- Broom and dustpan – simple, reliable, and often faster than gadgets
- Vacuum – nothing fancy required; consistency matters more than features
- A few microfiber cloths or rags – reusable and effective
- One all-purpose cleaner – you don’t need a different product for every surface
- Dish brush or sponge – whatever you’ll actually replace regularly
Kitchen Tools Worth Having
- Good knife – one sharp knife is better than a full dull set
- Cutting board
- One or two pots and pans
- Baking sheet – surprisingly versatile
- Mixing bowl
Laundry Essentials
- Laundry basket or hamper
- Laundry detergent you like and can afford
- Drying rack or dryer access
Organization Basics
- Trash bags and recycling bins
- A place for paperwork (folder, binder, or drawer)
- Basic storage you already own (baskets, bins, shelves)
Tools You Don’t Need (Especially as a Beginner)
These are often marketed as “must-haves” but rarely make daily life easier.
Overcomplicated Cleaning Gadgets
- A different cleaner for every room
- Single-purpose tools you forget to use
- Expensive machines that replace simple habits
Trendy Organization Products
- Matching containers for everything
- Drawer dividers before decluttering
- Storage bins bought before knowing what you’re storing
Specialty Kitchen Gadgets
- Appliances used only once or twice a year
- Tools that do only one very specific task
- “Time-saving” gadgets that take longer to clean than to use
Aesthetic-Only Purchases
- Things that create more clutter than function
- Tools bought just because they look pretty
- Items that don’t match how you actually live
Homemaking Is a Skill You Build Over Time
I mentioned as the beginning of this post that I felt overwhelmed at the beginning of my homemaking journey. I feel like this is a completely normal feeling when you’re starting out anything new, even homemaking.
Although it can be difficult to get used to all the tasks that may fall on your shoulders as a homemaker, once you figure out your rhythm, it can be the most fulfilling “job” in the world. I use quotations since we don’t get paid as homemakers, but I definitely view homemaking as a real job! Remember that consistency is way more important than perfection.
FAQ
What does homemaking include?
Homemaking can cover so many different parts of life (primarily within the home). Some examples of homemaking are: cleaning & tidying the home, food management like grocery shopping and meal planning, household organization, and way more.
Can you be a homemaker if you work full-time?
Absolutely. Being a homemaker doesn’t inherently mean you’re a stay-at-home mom. Homemakers who stay home and homemakers who work outside the home often share many of the same tasks.
How do I start homemaking with kids?
You just start. Consistency > Perfection. It’s about learning and failing and getting better each time. Include your children in your homemaking journey!
How long does it take to feel organized at home?
It may take longer for you than it does for some. Be willing to experiment with new routines and different systems to find what works best for you. Also understand that you may feel more organized in some seasons of life than in others.
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